You want to be valued, understood, and loved. Who doesn’t? God is love; and he has called us to love Him and our “neighbor” above all else. It is only natural that we seek to give and receive love. On your request for love, remember this: “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness?” (2 Cor 6:14 NKJV). The NCV says “do not join yourselves to them.” The Message translation says “Don’t become partners with those who reject God.” And the NLT says “Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers.”
The message is clear. But why? Granted, all unbelievers are not bad people. Furthermore Christians have been given the mission of bringing unbelievers to Christ. In doing so, you should be influencing them, not being influenced by them. That means not becoming so emotionally entangled that this person is being allowed to speak into your life. 2 Corinthians 6:14 goes on to say “what communion has light with darkness?” (NKJV) The lifestyles of an unbeliever versus that of a believer will eventually clash. Imagine this: You know you shouldn’t be frequenting the bar and clubs anymore, but that’s where all your friends are. So, you decide to go, “What’s the big deal as long as you don’t drink, right?”
So you go to the club, and now because you’re back in your old environment, you’re up to your old tricks – drinking, smoking, etc. What about this example: You’re saved, but you’re husband isn’t. He wants to “experiment” sexually and says that it’s your duty as his wife to do so. You’re torn between what you know is right, and satisfying your husband. Finally: You’re faced with an opportunity at work to get promoted based on something you didn’t do. You ask your unsaved wife whether you should keep your mouth shut or tell the truth.
She tells you “What your boss doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” You can be equally yoked outside of romantic relationships, but the implications of being unequally yoked outside of romantic relationships, but the implications of being unequally yoked in marriage can be devastating. It can drive a wedge between a husband and wife that can seem practically irreparable. This is the result of literally living in two different worlds. An excellent resource for wives of unsaved husband is “How to be a Happy Wife of an Unsaved Husband” by Linda Davis.
And while this is definitely one form unequally yoked relationships can come in, there are others. Perhaps you’re a husband whose wife is unsaved. Maybe your spouse is saved, but they’re not yet truly committed to living a life for God. In either case the answer isn’t to divorce your spouse – “And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her divorce him….For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband?…” (1 Cor 7:14, 16)
The answer in this case is to love your spouse unconditionally. Preaching won’t help, but prayer and being a living example of Christ’s love witl eventually save your spouse. In the event that you’re romantically involved with someone that isn’t saved, but not yet married – to get married would be ignoring the warnings in the bible, and setting yourself up for unnecessary challenges.
Relationships are never easy, and whether your spouse is saved or not, you will likely have at least a few minor difficulties. But the difficulties you’d encounter in a marriage between a believer and an unbeliever (or non – committed believer) are likely to be anything, but minor. Written By: Dominique Rambert
