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I can be bossy. I can admit it. In my case I’ve been doing everything myself for so long that it’s just innate. It feels awkward to wait for a man to open the door for me, if I get there first I automatically do it.
In past relationships I believed I played both roles very well. I was starting my own business, but still cooked, cleaned, and played wifey on occassion. That was my first mistake! I played wifey and submitted to a man who wasn’t my husband, to prove that I could.
I’m at a place now where I believe I am closer to finding balance and know my place as a Christian woman and a future wife. There is the misconception that submission equals being a door mat, maid, or weak, but there’s power in submission.
Don’t get me wrong, marriage doesn’t mean that your business or ministry must fall to the wayside, but we must understand that in a Christian household, there are roles that God has put in place.
Are you bossy? Do you have any insight into the subject?
This is such a great article and topic that needs to be addressed especially with black women. There’s a fine line between being “bossy” and just knowing what you want from your partner.
Early in my marriage I was entirely bossy. Then (through nearly losing my marriage) I became a believer and saw through the scriptures that I was to be a helpmeet. This was very hard for me, but I had such a dramatic change in my life before and after Christ, that I wanted to obey EVERYTHING the bible said. But you know, the more I gave up, the more I received. I found that where I would rein myself in, my husband would “man up” and do the right thing. I was not giving him a chance!
I have found that men really are just little boys inside (despite their tough outward appearance) who are just a little bit scared–they’re afraid of messing up. So they need our encouragement, not our taking over. Sometimes that’s a fine line, but it makes all the difference. And if they don’t pick up on it right away, we must be patient if we’ve got into a rut of bossing. Eventually they’ll notice and with our “help” they will “meet” the challenges.